Prison life
by Sho'Jo Untainted
Summary: Bakura and Yami are in jail and plan to escape. But with a Warden who collects the items, it’s a bit hard. But SOMEHOW the two seem to end up in the desert with only EACHOTHER. How will they survive prison and Desert life? Read and find out.
1. Its a hard not life for us

Summary: Bakura and Yami are in jail and plan to escape. But with a Warden who collects the items, it's a bit hard. But SOMEHOW the two seem to end up in the desert with only EACHOTHER. How will they survive prison/ Desert life? Read and find out.

G day

I put this story up a few days ago, but I really didn't like what I write blab la bla. So I have re- written it to kinda suit what I'm good at writing about----Stupid shit fics that no one enjoys lol. Ok. So ill try again and hopefully this time ill like it a bit more than the last.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything.

**This is all YOUR falt! **

"Ass hole"

"Dip shit"

"Mother FUCKIN good for nothing, spiky palm tree haired PHARAOH! Who has nothing else better to do than stick his nose in where is doesn't belong!" Bakura yelled kicking the bunk above his mattress.

"OW! Bakura! If you didn't TRY steal those jewels from the museum WE WOULDN'T BE HERE!" Yami yelled poking his head around the bunk to Bakura's pissed off one

Bakura rolled his eyes

"IF YOU DIDN'T COME AFTER ME! YOU WOULDN'T BE THERE AND I WOULDN'T HAVE GOTTEN CAUGHT!" he screamed giving the thin mattress a very powerful kick

"OW FUCK! I WAS BABY SITTING YOU REMEMBER! Yugi and RYOU went out, and to save them from YOU making a total JERK out of yourself as you usually do, I agree to look after you and give up MY time to come and make sure YOU didn't stick a knife in the toaster again! AND LOOK WHERE WE ARE!" Yami yelled spitting daggers at the tomb robber

Bakura looked at the bars of the locked sliding door that enclosed the two male's freedom.

"Yeah? Well at least I didn't propose to SLEEP with one of the cops so you didn't get arrested" Bakura said smirking "I took it like a man"

"YOU A MAN? THE COPS THOUGHT YOU WERE A GIRL!" Yami laughed remembering the image of the cops giving Bakura very flirtatious looks.

"HEY SHUT UP OK? Or is that TOO HARD for the Pharaoh to comprehend!" Bakura yelled literally jumping out of his bed and banging his wrists against the metal bars, which made a big noise as he done so.

Yami sighed as he looked at the number on the black and white rags he was reduced to wearing.

"Bakura, ok. Were both in this place now and there is nothing we can do about it. We will just have to serve our time and be done with it"

Bakura gave him a glare

"You actually think I'm going to stay here?" Bakura asked raising an eye brow

Yami blinked stupidly

"Well yeah, remember the warden took our items. Or I guess we could just chuck them over the fence and be free" Yami said annoyed "Oh I forgot! The stupid TOMBROBBER tried to send the guards to the shadow realm! I mean I don't understand you Bakura! WHY must YOU ruin everything?" Yami yelled again and then sighing trying to calm himself down.

Bakura looked at him raising an eyebrow

"You finished now?"

"Yes"

"Look, I don't plan on staying here for how ever many years we have to stay here for. I'm busting out of here" Bakura said getting a long piece of wire from his hair.

"You keep lock picks in you _hair?_" Yami asked watching the robber squat down and attempt to open the door.

"You'd be surprised what I keep in my hair" Bakura said mumbling as he slid the wire through the lock.

Yami rolled his eyes as he got off his bed and stood in front of the Tomb robber who was mumbling something about Egypt. With that Yami grasped the metal bars of the door and slid it across, Bakura watched the door slide across in front of him, not moving form the squatting position he was in.

Yami smiled as he walked out of the door.

Bakura blinked stupidly

"How did you do that?" Bakura asked raising an eye brow

Yami gave him a look

"It was open Bakura" he said walking away

Bakura put the wire in his hair as he ran after the Pharaoh.

**BACK OVAL**

"Ok so that's the plan, did your small brain manage to gasp that?" Bakura asked smiling

Yami nodded

"I got it"

Suddenly there was a shadow over looking the two Egyptians who turned around.

Bakura shrugged and looked confused at the large person standing in front of him.

"Ah can I help …

"What are youse doing here?" Asked the guard looking through his sun glasses at the two Egyptians

Bakura shrugged again

"Making a plan to escape, hey you're a prisoner right? Do you know where the warden keeps confiscated items?" Bakura asked

Yami hit his head

**WARDENS OFFICE**

The guard pushed Bakura and Yami in the air conditioned room of the warden. The two standing there pissed of and chained.

"Sir, these two were plotting to escape" said the guard taking off his hat

The warden looked up from his desk. His blue eyes, bald head, and pale skin glowing from the sun light"

"Ah, if it isn't Yami and Bakura!" he said smiling "You are the two I took your fashionable items off" he said smiling

Bakura smiled

"Yeah about that, we both are very sorry and have learnt our lesson so can we have them back already?" Bakura asked putting his hands on the warden's desk.

The warden laughed

"No" he said simply

"Aw that sucks Pharaoh's hair!" Bakura yelled before getting hit over the head from the guard.

Yami coughed

"Please Mr Warden. Those items are uh very important to us. It was a gift from our ahhh..

"DONKEY!" yelled Bakura smiling.

Yami kicked himself mentally as he sighed and looked at the expression of the warden.

"It was a gift from our donkey"

The guard and warden both raised an eye brow

"A donkey gave them to you?" the warden asked getting annoyed

"NO dick fraud. DONKEY, which was the nick name for a good friend of ours uhhh Ha…Harry Potter" Bakura said nodding

"Harry Potter?" Asked the warden

Yami sighed

"Which was a nick name for our friend uh Reese Guu, uh Gubbie" Yami said nodding at the warden who smirked.

"Oh! Well that makes all the difference! Because Reese Gubbie is also here, cell 23" the warden smiled

Yami swore under his breath

"Cant make a decent excuse up can you?" Bakura whispered to Yami who gave him a look that would make anyone feel nervous.

"Reese is here?" Yami asked acting surprised

"YYees! He was convicted here after raping 24 girls" the warden smiled

Bakura clicked his fingers through the hand cuffs.

"That would explain why in the 4th grade he pulled the girls dresses up"

The Warden smiled

"Any other lame excuses before I send youse two back?"

Yami cracked

"Please Mr Warden sir. thing. We NEED those items, their really important"

The Warden chuckled

"I'm sure they are, the millennium items would mean a great deal to anyone who had them!" he said smiling

The expression on both Yami and Bakura's face went blank.

"Uhhh the what?" Bakura asked acting stupid

"Millenium items!" the warden repeated looking through the draw

Yami and Bakura looked at each other.

"H…How do you know about the millennium items?" Yami asked a bit nervous

The warden laughed as he put the two items on his desk and then looked at the guard who was standing as still as a statue.

"Bill would you mind giving me a few minutes with these two?"

The guard nodded and walked out the door. When he was out of sight the Warden continued.

"Before I became a Warden I use to be fascinated with Egyptology! And what a better legend to study than the one about Pharaoh Yugioh?" he said smiling

Yami and Bakura laughed nervously

"Yeah go figure" Bakura said smiling

The warden smiled

"I've wanted these ever since I could remember. And now I can finally see what lies within the items. And if the spirit of the Pharaoh really exists!" he said smiling looking at the two objects shine in the sun light.

Yami and Bakura looked at each other.

"Well uh Mr Warden. I can tell you now there is no Pharaoh in THAT item ha..he he. I've had this item ever since I was young and I've never come across a Pharaoh" Yami said smiling breaking a sweat

"Yeah Bob can I call you Bob? Good. See Yami and I are Egyptian right? And automatically the knowledge about Pharaoh's is implanted in our head at birth. The Pharaoh who "Supposing" lives in that item is a pain in the ass." Bakura said nodding

The warden smiled

"Yes I know I guess it's impossible Yami. …But Bakura how do you know if that certain Pharoah was a pain in the ass?" he laughed "It's impossible"

/Does this guy take a breath/ Bakura asked himself rolling his eyes.

The Warend put the items in the draw

"Well as you can see boys, the items now belong to me, well, for another 2 years that is. But at ay time I can increase your time here. With one telephone call I can make it so you're here until you die"

Bakura laughed nervously

"Yeah. Wouldn't that be a blast"

/You would be waiting here for a while/ Yami thought annoyed

"So I suggest you stop plotting and get your be-hinds back in your cell"

Yami and Bakura nodded

"Yeah uh ok!" Bakura and Yami then turned around to be met by the same guard.

**CELL**

"DONKEY BAKURA! DONKEY!" Yami yelled walking into his cell and watching the guard lock it up.

Bakura shrugged

"I was ONLY trying to help"

"Yeah well next time don't!" Yami yelled

Bakura sighed as he leant against the wall.

"Of all people in charge we get the one who knows about the items"

Yami nodded and laughed a bit.

"It was funny about the Reese thing"

Bakura looked at Yami.

"We need to get them items back…..

**WARDENS OFFICE**

The warden smiled as he held the puzzle in his hands.

"Ok puzzle lets see what makes you tick" he said smiling. And with that he smashed the puzzle on his desk, the pieces going all over his desk"

**CELL**

"No Bakura, were not going to go visit cell number 23 or whatever that fat man said" Yami smiled.

Bakura rolled his eyes and snorted.

Bakura looked at Yami and then above at the cold wall, that had several messages on it from past prisoners.

There was a sudden flash and Bakura looked down and raised an eyebrow at the sudden absence of Yami.

"Yami?"

He climbed down the ladder and looked on the Pharaoh's bed….no Pharaoh

"Pharaoh?"

It suddenly clicked him.

"Oh that son of a bitch is going down!"

_End for now._

I think I like the idea of the warden being a bad guy also in this better. I think I like this chapter better too than the last one. WELL again the only way I'm going to update is if you review. Oh and maybe if you all want I can make this a Bakura X Yami fic. I mean if they are going to be stuck in the desert together I guess it would be funny. Well whats Bakura guna do? Read and Review ppl!

Until the next chapter (hopefully)

Hoo roo

Brooke


	2. Bakura the new Yugi!

Hi All. At the moment Australia is very boring. Australia day was yesterday WOOT and I had a great day! Like any other Aussie! Ok so I'll cut the crap, and get to it.

Disclaimer: Don't own It

**Bakura, the New Yugi?**

Bakura look left and looked right, and just to make sure looked left again. No one was in the corridors. He went into the squatting position and pulled the long wire out of his head.

/Gotta get the Pharaoh/

At that moment a little miniature Bakura in a devil costume appeared on the black and white striped shoulder of the tomb robber.

"Bakura, might I say that you are actually going to SAVE the pharaoh? I mean what the fuckinly fuck? Can you get softer? THIS is the guy who YOU HATE and SEALED you into that ring! And you wan to save him" The devil tutted "I am ashamed in you!"

Bakura bit his lip

"Yeah,YEAH! I guess our right! That bastard can go to hell!" Bakura yelled putting the wire in his hair and lying on his bed.

"That's my man" the devil said smiling

Bakura closed his eyes

"Hey are you that conscious thing with like a devil on one and an angel on the other….I thought I got rid of YOU when I was like 2 years old?" he said looking at the devil on his pillow

"Yeah well shut up" the devil said

Bakura sighed

"Hey isn't there suposta be another guy?"

At that moment another devil appeared and sat on Bakura's pillow.

"Sorry I'm late what did I miss?..

WARDENS OFFICE

The warden looked at the pieces and smirked.

/These pieces are even more complex than I ever dreamed of/ he thought to himself grinning as he put another piece in place.

BAKURAS CELL

"Yeah I agree the caveman DID come before the egg and the rooster" Bakura nodded to the two devils smirking above him

Bakura sighed

"What's wrong big guy?" asked one of the devils looking at the albino's expression

"Nothing" Bakura said turning over

"You feel guilty!" the other devil said

"No I don't I'm thinking" Came the reply

The two devils rolled their eyes

"And the pope is my father" said one sarcastically

Bakura turned over

"Really?"

"NO!"

"Oh" Bakura said disappointed.

Bakura looked at the devils and though.

"But if I escape I won't have any food! If I bring Yami with me, he will think I'm doing it out of the goodness of that thing,

"A heart" the devils said together

"Yeah that! But really ill bring him and eventually eat him!" Bakura said smiling

The devils shrugged

Bakura got up and reached into his hair again and got out the long wire, sat down and began to pick the lock.

YAMI'S SOUL ROOM

"Where is he?" Yami yelled frustrated walking in circles in his soul room. Then it hit him.

/What if Bakura is escaping as we speak/

WARDENS OFFICE

"La la la, going to solve the puzzle" he sang as he put yet another piece in place.

There was a knock at his door

"Come in" he said smiling not taking his head down from the puzzle

Bakura walked in and jumped a bit when he saw the puzzle right in front of him.

"Bakura! Long time no speak. How can I?" But he was interrupted

"Warden there is a fight! Uh down in the uh, CAFETERIA! The prisoners! They are holding the guards prisoner" he stopped

/The prisoners are holding the guards prisoner/ he thought in his head /Note to self: laugh hysterically later/

The warden looked at him

"Bakura?"

Bakura shook his head

"They have requested 700 doughnuts in the next 2 mins or the guards get it and they said no police!" Bakura said dramatically

The warden got up

"Ok Bakura show me the way!" he said running out the door

"OK!" Bakura said slowly running after him and slamming the door when the Warden was gone.

"He trusted a prisoner who uses donkeys in his excuses….LAME" Bakura said running to the puzzle

"BAKURA!" yelled the angry warden

Bakura whistled

"SORRY CAN'T HEAR YOU!" he said smiling sitting in the large chair

"BAKURA OPEN THIS DOOR NOW!" yelled the angry warden

Bakura looked at the puzzle pieces and sighed.

With a poof the two devils smiled.

"TAKE IT BAKURA! AND RUN! You have waited far too long for this moment!" said the one on the right

"YEAH TAKE IT!" said the one on the left

Bakura looked at the puzzle and got the pieces.

"I'm going to put it together!" he said flicking the devils off his shoulder.

He got what the warden had done and got a piece.

"Bakua! You can do that you have an IQ of a cotton bud!" said the devils laughing

Bakura looked at the pieces and then quickly looked at the draw.

"I have about 3 mins, to do something that took Yugi like what ages to do!" Bakura said cracking his knuckles.

And with that the tomb robber got to work.

3 mins later

By now the guards were trying to knock down the door and Bakura was beginning to panic. He had 3 more pieces to go and about 20 seconds to do them in. The tomb robber wiped the sweat dripping of his nose and laughed as he put 2 more pieces in the correct spot, a small glowey light indicating that it was indeed the correct move to make. Bakura smiled to himself and with that put the final piece in, as the door slammed open and the guards came in. A sudden flash and Yami was standing next to Bakura who grinned as he opened the draw and got out the ring.

"Yami? When did you get in here?" asked the warden

"Uh, the window" Yami said nodding

The warden raised an eyebrow

"No there is no way you could have climbed the…." He paused and suddeny his face looked like a wave had hit him

"YOU'RE THE SPIRIT! YOU'RE THE PHARAOH!" he yelled fascinated

Yami hesitated

"Uh no I'm not" Yami said nodding

Bakura's mind was going frantic for an escape of some sort escape plan.

"What are we going to do?" Yami asked through his clenched teeth.

"Getting there" Bakura replied trying to sound as quiet as possible.

"Bakura and Yami give me those items now!" The warden yelled putting out his hand

Bakura looked behind him at the large window and had a sneak peek what was below it…a large dust bin….perfect

Yami looked at the guards who were sneaking up on the two and with that Bakura grabbed the Pharaoh's hand and smashed into the window brining both the Pharaoh and the tomb robber down….all the way

66

OK that one wasn't that good. Oh well my imagination aint working properly

Ok review ppl! Andi promise next chapter it will be funny…Bakura HELD yamis hand could this be the beginning of a B-E-A-U-T-Y ful relation ship? Well again the only way r gunna know is if you review, or I wont update. HAPPY AUSTRALIA DAY TO ALL!

Hoo roo

Brooke

Ps: sorry about spelling mistakes, just think like a 2 year old..ull get it.


	3. ESCAPE!

G day

Guys I would like to say how sorry I am, I have like 40 billion assessments and to be a police woman I gota do em. I randomly chose a fic and this one was it, so I hope u all wherever u are from are having a good one! (day). IM so tired,im gunna die. This update wont be the best one in the world, but I promise the next one will be like so good u will all….b….um….good.

Disclaimer: don't own ne thing.

**Escape. **

Bakura's eyes shot up as soon as he heard the guards getting closer.

He looked at the Pharaoh below him and grabbed his hand. Trying to get his mind off the horrible smell coming from the bin.

"COME ON MOTHER FUCKER!" Bakura yelled again grabbing the pharaoh's arm and pulling him out of the bin. They had no time to lye down, and Bakura wasn't going to get caught for the second time.

"Bakura! Hurry their coming!" Yami yelled slowly getting out from the bin, feeling a throbbing pain in his leg.

They had only been running for about half a metre when Yami who had landed in an funny position from the jump, stopped suddenly on the tomb robber and sat on the floor holding his knee.

"My knee!" Yami yelled hugging his leg.

Bakura looked up; the guards were getting closer, trying to inclose the pair. And to make matters worse guards were shooting from the window they had jumped out of.

"Shit" Bakura said grabbing Yami's arm. He looked at their destination and figured he could make it.

"GET ON ME!" Bakura yelled through the bullets that were just missing.

Yami nodded and Bakura squatted down allowing the Pharaoh to climb on his back. They had about a 50 metre run to the fence where they would have to throw the items over, and then run some more.

Bakura was panting as the rusty fence was getting closer, however so were the guards. And Bakura didn't have enough time to send them to the shadow realm without getting a bullet through his head.

One leg after the other, the tomb robber ran, carrying the pharaoh on his back. He could hear the gun shots firing and the guards getting too close for his liking.

/OK Bakura you can do this/ he yelled to himself.

There was a sudden scream from the boy on his back; Bakura looked on his shoulder to see the former Pharoha's face full of pain, or more pain than he was originally in.

"What?" Bakura asked stopping suddenly.

"He! He got me!" Yami yelled.

Bakura knew Yami had just gotten shot and had to make a decision that would change the outcome of both their lives.

He could..

Keep running, get over the fence and escape with no medical equipment for either of them

OR

Give himself up, and try to escape again in a few weeks time.

At that moment time froze for Bakura, and the two devils appeared in front of him.

"Oh, its youse two again" Bakura said annoyed.

The devils smiled.

"Buddy I'm telling you now, drop the dick fad on the floor and bolt!" one of them said

Bakura shook his head, sweat dripping off it.

"But…" Bakura stuttered.

"Don't you but me!" they said as one. "What has this FREAK ever done for you! All he has caused you is more suffering!"

Bakura looked at the frozen pained expression on Yami's face and the grip holding the Pharaoh up began to loosen.

"That's it big guy!" devil number 2 said.

At that point Bakura looked at the devils smiling with the smirks you would see when Bakura had an idea. But the tomb robber had other plans.

"No"

And with that the thief began to run again. For someone who had another human on them, Bakura ran pretty damn fast. He reached the fence and grabbed the ring, chucking it over the tall fence, and soon after that the Pharaohs puzzle.

"GET HIM! FIRE AT WILL!" yelled the leading guard.

But before the bullets got to Bakura, the two were gone.

For the second time in the last hour the tomb robber opened his eyes, this time in his soul room. He immediately returned to his physical form and looked at the dirt ground to see the puzzle and ring lying there. He grabbed both, and didn't care what was behind him, he ran….. And wasn't planning to stop.

The warden stumbled to the gate to see the white haired demon run away, bolting into the deserted area.

"Sir, we have ordered a search party as we speak to catch the two scoundrels" said one of the guards.

The warden looked at him, his face full of anger and frustration.

"Get every guard on this search. I want media, and helicopters. The spirits of the Millennium puzzle and Ring are on the loose."

END FOR NOW

Yes there are a zillion things wrong with that chapter, ill fix it up later. But please be nice, ive been really flat out lately, holidays are ….."soon" so I promise ill do heaps of chapters then.

Please reiew! I know it wasn't the bestest chater but you know how it goes!

Hoo Roo

Brooke


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